The Reasons Some of Us Don’t Use Condoms

By Gamal Hennessy

In spite of the fact that condoms have been around since 1350 B.C. not everyone trusts them. In spite of the fact that condoms are the most successful method of preventing unwanted pregnancies and the spread of sexually transmitted disease not everyone thinks they are worth the trouble. In spite of the fact that condoms can be purchased in every Duane Reade, bodega and pharmacy from South Ferry to Yonkers, some people don’t have any. If they work and they are easy to get, what reason can someone have for not using them? Understanding the thought process might help you recognize these people when you go out so you have a chance to avoid them.

The New York Department of Health and Mental Hygiene randomly sampled 10,000 adults New Yorkers about their sexual history. According to their study, 1 in 4 New Yorkers do not use condoms as part of their sexual practice. Yvonne Fulbright, a columnist for Fox News has put together a list of reasons some of these people for their choice.

· “Condoms dull the sensation of sexual intercourse.”
· “Other people get STD’s, not me.”
· “I’m usually drunk or high when I have sex, so I don’t remember to use a condom.”
· “I’m on the pill, so I don’t need a condom.”
· “She was ready to go, we didn’t have one and I didn’t want to kill the mood going to the store.”
· “I wanted to, but my partner didn’t and I didn’t want to disappoint them.”
· “I was in love and people in love don’t use condoms.”
· “I wanted him to get me pregnant so he would stay.”
· “I feel guilty about carrying one around.”

Sex is an integral part of nightlife. It is often sublimated in almost every aspect of the experience. That means that STD’s are a potential problem for all of us. During the AIDS outbreak, nightlife and the arts were the hardest hit communities. Consider this, if you go out this weekend and get 8 phone numbers (because you’re so damn sexy), 2 of those people don’t use condoms or have had sex with someone who doesn’t use condoms if the Department of Health is accurate. HIV cases are on the rise again in certain segments of the population. Herpes cases are also on the rise. If you go out at night and sex is part of the equation, then that risk is also part of the equation. Most of that risk goes away when the condom comes out.

Some people might decide that sex without a condom is more desirable than life itself. Despite what we might think, people have a right to make that choice, even if their reasons for that choice lack reason, judgment and common sense. What they can’t do is make that choice for you. If you think sex with a condom (which is pretty hot by the way) is a small price to pay for living, don’t let someone else take your choice away. Guys and girls can walk around with condoms. You can speak up for yourself when clothes are flying off. And although it might be annoying, painful and mess up an entire night you can walk away from someone who doesn’t want to use one. You might be walking away from more painful consequences.

Have fun.
Gamal

Hiding from the Doctor

By Gamal Hennessy

HIV rates are rising among some groups that make up the nightlife population. To deal with this situation, some groups are advocating a greater ability to reach these people with education and testing. Others are pushing for more condoms made available in the nightlife environment. These efforts are commendable, but they might prove futile if at risk groups are not willing to protect themselves. There is evidence that some people are going beyond hiding sexual details from their partners. They are hiding information from their doctors too.

Data from a recent survey from the Centers for Disease Control National HIV Behavioral Survey shows that 39% of men in New York City do not disclose their sexual practices to their doctors. In addition, the study shows that doctors are also reluctant to inquire about a patients sexual practices. The men who didn’t talk to their doctors were less likely to be tested for HIV, and less likely to get information from their doctors about the disease. While the study focused on men who have sex with other men, the majority of these men did not identify themselves as gay and did not limit their sexual partners to just men. Experts point to the continued stigma surrounding coming out as a leading cause of the silence between patients and doctors about sexual activity.

Between the schizophrenic attidutes that pervade sexuality in American in general and the continuing stigma associated with homosexuality in particular, it isn’t suprising that some are reluctant to discuss or even acknowledge their sexuality, even to the people who are supposed to protect them. While the lack to communication between patients and doctors places everyone at risk, it is probably unrealistic to think this situation will change. If 1 in 3 at risk men in the nightlife environment can’t or won’t protect themselves, and they are having sex with men and women we all need protection. More condom use will protect you from the people who won’t protect themselves.

Source: New York City Health Department: E-Max Health

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The New Safe Sex Push

Sexually transmitted disease is on the rise in New York City. Condom use is down. Certain clubs are being targeted for promoting sexual acts on their premises. Advocates fear that a new round of suppression, fines and ostracizing will push these clubs underground and increase the spread of AIDS. One group has developed a proposal that would help local health departments and nightlife venues work together to protect the public.

The proposal advocates changes in the state health code to allow for sex with a condom in sex clubs and bathhouses. It is currently illegal to have any type of sex in these establishments with or without a condom. (See Nightlife News for April 29th ‘Cracking Down on Gay Sex Clubs”) The change was advocated by the Commercial Sex Venues Coalition and adopted by the New York City's Prevention Planning Group the group that advises the city on HIV prevention initiatives. Both groups want to use the sex venues as centers for safe sex education and HIV testing. They feel that before they can take that step, some form of protected sex has to be exempted from the public health and sanitary laws.

If the goal is increasing condom use and decreasing the spread of STD’s in clubs then this proposal makes sense. NYN suggested last month that gay and straight clubs provide and promote the use of condoms. But this opens up several questions for club owners, managers, security and patrons. Are clubs going to be liable for the possible consequences of sex in their establishments (unwanted pregnancies, rape, STD’s) if they offer condoms? Do managers have to provide separate areas for sex? Does security have to monitor activity in the club to determine if condoms are being used? Will patrons have to watch their step or trip over someone or several someone’s who can’t wait until they get home? It might make more sense for the clubs to offer the condoms but not the permission to have sex inside. That way, we have easier access to the condoms without having to slip in someone’s over enthusiasm when we’re trying to dance…

By the way, I didn’t know there was a Commercial Sex Venues Coalition, but it sounds like an interesting job….

Source: Duncan Osborne Gay City News

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Opinion: The Evolution of Gay Sex Clubs

Opinion
The Evolution of Gay Sex Clubs
(Steve Weinstein Village Voice)
This year’s New York Pride Week marks a turning point in the relationship between heterosexual and homosexual culture in America. California has recently started issuing same sex marriage licenses and the political climate might be right for other states to follow suit.

This year could also see a change in the relationship between homosexuals and nightlife. As the social system changes, staples of gay culture begin to fade away. Gay sex clubs might be one of those staples. It is not necessarily government persecution or disease that’s fueling this trend. A certain segment of the gay community doesn’t seem to want those kinds of parties anymore. The argument is that because coming out doesn’t automatically lead to social isolation anymore, gays and lesbians are less likely to seek release in public sex venues and are therefore less likely to seek out gay sex parties.

While there might be some merit to this argument, there is evidence that the city is helping the trend along by exerting pressure on local gay sex clubs (See Nightlife News Health 4/29/08: “City Cracks Whip on Gay Sex Clubs”) and HIV is still a major concern (See Nightlife News Health 1/8/08: “HIV Cases on the Rise”). Maybe it’s the combination of all three factors, plus the rise of the internet as a source of sexual contact, that are killing off the gay sex parties. This combination could lead to lower HIV rates and further social acceptance between straight and gay communities. It could also be another sign of the homogenization of nightlife in New York, where more and more things are the same and the unique flavor of the city is harder to find.

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Does New York Nightlife Need to Offer Condoms?

Health
Herpes Cases on the Rise in NYC
(Dan Mangan: New York Post)
Fortunately one of the underlying motivations in nightlife is sex. From the music to the clothing to the liquor, sexual overtones range from subtle to blatant. Unfortunately this atmosphere might contribute to a higher risk of sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s) in the city. One study has determined that herpes is more widespread in the city that in other parts of the country.

The 2004 report from the city’s Health and Nutrition Examination Survey found that 1 in 4 New York adults, or 26%, carry the herpes simplex 2 virus. Since only 15% of the carriers will develop visible symptoms, most of the people who have it don’t know it and are more likely to pass it onto others.

This does not mean that New Yorkers are having too much sex. But it is worth mentioning that getting herpes makes you more vulnerable to HIV. HIV cases are also on the rise in New York among certain demographic groups, which correlates to the city’s findings on herpes. The solution is simple; better sex through condom use. Condoms protect against herpes, HIV and other STD’s so using them will help curtail the spread of both viruses. There might not be such a thing as too much sex, but there might be such a thing as too much unprotected sex.

Unfortunately, condom use is down in New York, especially among at risk groups. Is access the answer? In some schools, condoms are already available and it has arguably helped. Is it time for condoms to become available in bars and clubs, close to the mints and cologne that the bathroom attendant hovers over or sitting at the end of the bar with the club logo on it? Some might claim that condoms in clubs might encourage people to have sex in clubs, but this is ignoring the reality of clubs. Condoms in clubs won’t encourage people have sex. Dark lighting, pounding music, strong drinks and a room full of barely dressed people who want to have sex encourage people to have sex. And club security already clamps down on dancing that gets too dirty, so it’s not as if condoms are going to suddenly remind people about sex. The only thing that condoms can do in clubs (if they get used) is to make the whole process safer for everyone involved.

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